CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize