I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize