I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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