she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
