its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Randomize
