The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
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I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
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speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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