yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize