How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
