Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
