Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
only you would photoshop your dick
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
