never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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