there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
