dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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