the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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