Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
