oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
