you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
