So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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