Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
