do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
