he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i dont even know how to be here
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
