Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Randomize
