It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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