i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
