i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
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Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
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I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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