Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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