Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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