You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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