we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize