The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
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I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
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Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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