This girl is more easily done than said...
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I just threw up on my dentist
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
