doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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