Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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