Don't you send me to vm
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize