I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
