Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
