Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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