very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
