Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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