"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
