Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
