Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
