Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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