On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
