I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I didn't notice because vodka
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
