"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
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