If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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