my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
