i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
