I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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